Care on a short term basis

Surely I am not the only person out there who passes through some seasons of life with less company than in others. In this state of preparing for major life transitions, I sometimes feel a little guilty for desiring to make the best of it.

If you genuinely care about people in a way you can’t escape from, it can be easy to care about strangers. Potentially the biggest saving grace of a new season is when you can care enough about people to love them in passing. It’s not as though if you care for strangers, you avoid longer term friendships. But sometimes in the absence of the ability to stay very long, it’s okay to really just enjoy right now and cut your losses.

I know that there are a lot of people who primarily invest in select long term friends. I admire the loyalty of those people. They seem to know what they want.

But I am not like those people. I am glad the world has them. I am glad that maybe for some people they make very good long term friends. My goals are more to play well with everyone. To be able to enjoy the company of a wide variety of different people. I no longer see friendship as a sort of contract, and I guess I’m at this point where I’m okay letting go. You kind of have to be. I see relationship quality as an intentional function of time. If a person wants to stick around, they will. Sometimes it’s not entirely a personal choice. In general though, I’m happy to accept the time I have and try to have really lovely adventures with what’s there. It means a lot more when someone sticks around because they are enjoying your company. If you enjoy the time you have when you only have a little, when that time builds up, it really means something.


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I am a second-grade teacher and pastor-to-be who loves people. I spend my weekends with friends or wandering the museums of DC alone and with a journal, trying to put words on the places of the soul that still feel wordless. I spent most of my days at school trying to learn patience through my students and running on sheer nerdy passion. I follow Jesus Christ, and savor that as my most important identity--that I am a child of God, as are infinite others, regardless of their other identities. Christ is my one thing.

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