Waiting for the DOWNPOUR

Mkay so it’s spring time, and you know it because it’s like 60 degrees out still at 10pm, and we’re set to have our first decent thunderstorm soon, right here in magestic Lawrence,  KS. I forget what I read in the forecast, but from the scraps I remember,  it sh start around 8am tomorrow morning. Any minute now.

Ella and Ted are well. Ella has always done this thing where she paws you in the face, but lately shes been making me hold her like a baby, and it’s kind of cute when she studies my face and then licks the tip of my nose. Kind of weird, but then again, what else is new. We took Ted to the vet, because he has a fatty Poodle tumor on his chest.  No cancer. The vet bills were all enough to make you be all like, “WHAAAAAAT?”, but I’m glad my mom plays it on the safe side. Do you think you can dye your hair with henna mixed into hair oil? The world stands still, and is riveted to this moment.

It’s funny, because minimalism is the gift that grows. Like mold. Or sea monkeys. If you don’t need much, you’ll probably need less later. Which is great, because of gifts. Its so much better to give than to get crap, because the crap you get back isn’t nearly as good. It’s optional. At least with giving,  you know you can supply a need.

I’ve been thinking a lot today on how hard it is to help people who pretend they are perfect. I think independence is good, but if you want to help someone,  it is basically no good if they don’t allow themselves to be helped. Especially if that person denying help withholds help from another. We don’t live in isolation,  for the most part.  It just sucks to want to share things and not be able. On the other hand, we all have to learn that lesson in submission for ourselves. Not the easiest.

Ella runs down her dog ramp now when it’s daylight, and bounds into the piles of straight up green grass. She looks so happy.  Its like you’ve watched someone run off a slide and then promptly frolic. Its a beautiful thing.

Last weekend,  I decided to use Ella to wake Ted up. He sleeps so freaking much. Ridiculous.

So I played with her, and put hwr on the bed where he was sleeping, and had her lie on top of him because my hands were petting him, and for the time being my hands were her chew toys. It’s like teething.  Go figure. She rolled around, more or less displacing him. Sorry to report it didn’t really work. He wanted to sleep, and he slept.

Mischief is the theme of the week. Looking hella forward to Easter this weekend. Its a good time to put things in perspective. I wonder how many people will be wearing pastels.  I wonder if they’ll be candy at church. I know that’s not the point of easter, but if I stay on track, I’ll be super pumped when the time comes, and I’ll get to celebrate with friends. Church for the win!

If you’re gonna be a nerd, why not be a nerd for the gospel? At least its useful. Whatever.

Getting pumped to go to China this summer.  Its like, “Peace out,  America.” My brother told me I should try to learn the lyrics for Hotel California, and something about a Beijing (it was a famous song from some point,  idk). I found this really great rain jacket for $16. Gonna buy some good sunscreen before I go. Still don’t really know all the shenanigans we’re gonna get up to, but that’s kind of the point. It’s gonna be great.

The intensity for my classes picked up, but the pace has not. Maybe it’s just me, but it feels like the pace has slowed, even. Maybe they give you extra time to loose your mind.

Why is it that the first thing most people see when they look still one another is a threat? The world is a dumb place for real compassion. So be it. Easter tells me it will spread.
My dance class is so cool. It’s cool to think of how many different life circumstances and life events relate to a dance, or at least, the metaphor. It’s a representation worth studying, because in understanding other humans, DANG is that useful.

You ever notice how many people there are that tell you to decrease your number of dreams when they can’t outright tell you to dream smaller? Quantity versus quality, and sometimes it seems like what they mean to tell you is to want less. They won’t believe it could be done for themselves, and they are trying to “protect” others. I care about those people, but they are wrong. Maybe someday, wells learn from one another.  I just don’t know what to say. You mean you want me to live less? Take fewer risks? The greatest risk I was taking was to believe it could be done.  I can do that from my couch. Faith is like that.

We live through others when we want to give sometimes, but often we limit the ones we love in the ways we can’t allow for ourselves.  Either that, or we force others to live our dreams. Our passions are too precious to put onto others. They should be allowed to share,  but have freedom to have their own. Your life is worth living, if you are alive. Think how much more precious those dreams would be, if you were the one living them. Love is like that.

Why do so few people see the continuity of life as infinite second chances? It takes forgiveness and grace, to be sure. But even then, if you’ve received it, WHY wouldn’t you use it? You can still be useful yet. There will always be more love.

Teddy likes sleeping in the tighest ball he can manage. Ella looks like a lion with a black and white mane. My sister needs a haircut.

Anyways, have a good rest of tonight, tomorrow morning,  whenever!

Fond wishes your way,



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I am a teacher-to-be who loves people. I am not afraid of many things. I like to explain my thoughts logically on a very birds-eye view level--I was born thinking that way. I follow Jesus Christ, and I accept only that label to describe my identity--that I am a child of God, as are infinite others, regardless of their other identities. Christ is my one thing.

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