Dissatisfied: Free to a bad home


Dissatisfied: Free to a bad home

I’m giving away my secrets,

Because I hate those suckers anyways.

I hate concealing who I am,

I hate to lie, even if I do it terribly.

I’m giving away my worries, because I hate the way they nag,

I don’t care if they become the next parasite in someone else’s mind,

The little cluster of ear worms that likes to squabble among itself,

Should probably start scanning the Classifieds.

I’m giving away my knowledge,

Because the knowledge was always good,

Until people tried to possess and manipulate it,

Spilling bad attitudes,

Shedding bad truths that are actually not true,

Funny thing;

The truth will always remain the truth,

And it is only good.

I’m giving away my hesitation,

It never fit quite right anyways,

You say Jump, I scream Where?

You say dance, I move,

That is just how it is.

Why should I walk alone in this?

I’m giving away the parts of me that insist they cannot tolerate their neighbors,

Sarcasm, Idolatry, Anger, Insensitivity; y’all can find your way out.

You may never leave all the way,

But I’d rather make it known formally that you are no longer welcome here.

I’m giving away the indecision,

I know what I know always,

And it doesn’t change.

You want the truth?

So be it,

I will find the words if you find the patience,

And we can celebrate it together.

I’m giving away the fear of discernment that grows in opening my eyes,

There are such terrible things that are here, walking with us,

Let’s give those bastards a run for their money.

Things are not so hard if we feel them with our full hearts and minds,

If we allow each of those as isolated incidents to dissipate,

And we make an actual effort to choose to be better.

The growing children of my generation give me hope,

We may not be able to overcome any of that,

But at least we know it and may try to work with one another.

All of human history, tying its shoe laces in intricate ribbons and bows:


We are sick and tired of meaningless meanings and emptying emptiness;

We will not scrap the good bits with the garbage,

But while people of all ages bicker over the carrion,

We will construct the Kingdom of God so that Christ might fulfill it.

We may not succeed,

But those of us that build from the spirit out will know goodness,

And success means so much less than the truth anyways.

So, I issue a challenge to all the people who would like to casually cling to the bits and cinders they cannot control,

The misery and false promises,

The knowing and disappointing,

The same old routine:

Run the other way. See what happens. Dare to experience what is still left of your life. Be still and in that stillness, be loved.

And apart from that, breathe. Breathe here and there, then breathe over there, then breathe halfway across the world, and come back to breathe for the last time in some other place equally wonderful. Do what you love because you can. Breathe.


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I am a teacher-to-be who loves people. I am not afraid of many things. I like to explain my thoughts logically on a very birds-eye view level--I was born thinking that way. I follow Jesus Christ, and I accept only that label to describe my identity--that I am a child of God, as are infinite others, regardless of their other identities. Christ is my one thing.

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