I imagine Paul and me would bicker a lot,

He always thinks he’s right,

But I can’t wait to have us at each other’s throats,

There would be a lot to argue about.


Why you gotta be such an asshole to the ladies?

Actually, I already knew that that wasn’t what you were going for bud,

I was just giving you shit.


Do you think that he’d give me wings like a bird, today if I asked?

I asked before,

Like that little girl in the backyard of Forest Gump and God,

I wanted to fly so bad Paul,

I still do.

It was a sad day when Mary Poppins was wrong,

It was a sad day when planes became habit.

I just want to explode past the rainbow,

I sing like Judy Garland when I’m scared

Because she’s right in a melancholy way.


Do you think it’s worth it?

I mean, like life and everything?

You’re right, that isn’t really the point.

I just wish it came easier sometimes;

I think we all do.

Did you know when Stephen’s clothes fell at your feet?

Or were the scales only visible walking to Damascus?

Or was that when you just got frightened?


Do you think I’m right to wait?


Would you do it if you knew it like I do?

Yeah, I thought so.

Thanks for reminding me

(I needed it).

I know that Jacobs the one to wrestle,

I dare him to beat me at a race though,

At least, if I got those wings I asked for.

Would you let me beat you at Connect Four, Paul?

Would you let me trash talk you and poke you and giggle

And let it all just happen

Because you saw right through it and loved me enough to put up with my bullshit?

I hope so,

We’re gonna have a Connect Four tournament like every single week,

I’m pretty sure that all of these plans are irrelevant, actually,

I’d rather just dance.

It will be ok.

We’ll drag them all into it,

Will you be my wingman?

I want you to be.

Do you think that if I wear my red I’m-fearless skirt my mom tried to goodwill away like every day of junior high

I will be faster when I run?

I hope so.

That’s the one I wore when we took the dogs on our walk,

And I still love him, Paul

(Even though he’s an idiot).

Would you step in and dance with me in the meantime,

Would you be the one with the stupid bow tie?

And the one with the polka dots that had me tranced before Black Friday,

It was being a total dick,

Just saying dumb truths.

Paul I just want to high five all the friends I’ve got,

It will be like Down by the Banks

But times like

A billion

Or something.

Can you PLEASE send some pointers for when and when not to bicker his way?

Thanks in advance,

It’s super annoying,

But it’s still cute I guess.

(I like him best when he shuts up, actually)

(Screw the rationale behind that, my friend, none of us know.)

I just want to be your friend Paul,

And I seriously can’t bicker you resurrected here,

To fight for me.



Let’s go,

We’ll dance when I get there,

And in the meantime, thank you for all the letters. They are my sanity. I really like 2nd Corinthians this week, but mostly I just like to make it all up and see what happens and read it all when I’m scared or I want to and I’m happy.


It’s been real,

Gonna chat you later,

Don’t forget the bow tie,



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I am a teacher-to-be who loves people. I am not afraid of many things. I like to explain my thoughts logically on a very birds-eye view level--I was born thinking that way. I follow Jesus Christ, and I accept only that label to describe my identity--that I am a child of God, as are infinite others, regardless of their other identities. Christ is my one thing.

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