I know it’s probably too much information, but I don’t care. The peas taste like metal and the carrots squish like they were just biding their time to squish right. And anything that shares a lot of ingredients with ketchup will be my best friend regardless of how we’d all like to rationalize it. The vinegar taste with the tomatoes and the onion powder. You know how much I loved going abroad? Enough to where I had enough self control to only eat real (Heinz; but Hunts when you want something heavier and fuller flavored with too much tomato) ketchup only in restaurants where they have it. A grand total of like, 5 times. In 5 months. It was a monthly celebration, and you had no idea when it was coming. This is the girl that dressed up in pearls as ketchup for Halloween. I seriously contemplated stealing a ketchup jug from my old residence hall, and decided against it because Jesus. But still. I just want to find a way to eat things that are most like ketchup for the rest of my life, in terms of joy and not necessarily ingredients. And that is why I would eat some soup. Because cravings are a gift, because they make it all very exciting. Like, I have waaaaay too much self control, so when I build that shit up, it’s ridiculous. It’s like raining donuts from the ceiling and cutting yourself off at just barely too much and coveting leftovers and eating chinese food at 1am because you had enough self control (and only enough) to wait exactly 3 hours and 43 minutes until it went up in flames. I may not always have it, but when it’s with me, I just want to live in a sea of asian food and then come back down to earth and force myself through the rest (even if I burnt it). If I can do fudge in a smoothie, who the fuck cares? So long as I breathe. But seriously, we are out of ketchup at my house, I even used the packets. I have yet to tell my mom. Maybe I should dress in black. Yeah, probably. She won’t understand otherwise, but I like to think the extra dramatic flair will be good for our souls and coming before God humble, to ask for some more ketchup. bhhahahhah ok but seriously I should text her.