The Women Scorned Network

The Women Scorned Network

Welcome to the in-flight viewing

Of the Women Scorned Network of Jerusalem.

To receive your member benefits

Simply swipe you slate card (the fig-leaf insignia next to the expiry date)

And begin to rest in comfort,

11,000 feet elevation

Above the earth

As much liquor as you can imagine

(Really, anything you can imagine.)

(We’ve got machines and tricks and fix-its for all of it)

From the entrance of the cabin

You can find your emergency flotation vest

In case you of spontaneous rejection from the vessel

Due to uncontainable happiness.

You should be able to figure it out

Without any set of written or pictorial diagrams

Once you hit the water.

If you, you are cordially invited to ask to be rescued by our Head of Staff,

Who is for his price in blood, will also teach you to walk on the same water you are wallowing in.

You never know if you don’t ask

So I suggest you do ask

We’ve got all the amenities.

If you can’t ask

Simply decide

And you won’t have to ask, we’ll help make up your mind for you.

Don’t forget to empty your soul of residual bitterness

We have a fresh stock of hand squeezed bitterness just waiting for your constant consumption

And you have the choice of limitless in flight drinks and refreshments

So that you can develop your palate.

Please let us know if you need anything,

The button will light up automatically without your aid,

And we’ll be over to greet you with fresh bitterness just as soon as it does.

Monday

Tuesday

Wednesday

Thursday

Friday

Saturday

Sun…

Maybe Sunday if you’re lucky.

I hear God is resting then, so don’t you worry, we should have an extra unlimited stock for Sundays.

Don’t forget to go to church,

Don’t forget to say your prayers,

Don’t forget to do what Jesus would do,

After all,

We’ll be here whenever you need us.

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Published by

haleylol

I am a teacher-to-be who loves people. I am not afraid of many things. I like to explain my thoughts logically on a very birds-eye view level--I was born thinking that way. I follow Jesus Christ, and I accept only that label to describe my identity--that I am a child of God, as are infinite others, regardless of their other identities. Christ is my one thing.

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